Come Fly with Me

In the course of his job the Gorse Fox has had to fly throughout the UK, Europe and across to the United States quite frequently over the years. For some flying is a traumatic experience, for him it is always an adventure. He's still a big kid and just loves to fly. Airports give him a buzz, planes give him a lift, and new destinations always intrigue him.

This is not to say that he is a blasé traveller. The Silver Vixen will witness that he is packed, ready and pacing hours before he needs to be. If the airport is 30 minutes drive, he'll allow 90 minutes, if the flight has a two hour check-in, he'll allow three for safety. His logic is that waiting at home or in a traffic jam is more stressful than arriving in plenty of time and browsing the shops or reading.

Flying fairly frequently you are bound to see or experience some quite strange sights, indeed some which border on the bizarre.

One of his earlier flights on a 747 took him to New York one summer. It had been a good journey, with great service and no turbulence. Looking out over the right wing was a marvellous view of Boston and Cape Cod as we started our descent. The plane lost high at a steady rate and looking up he saw a small trickle of water. Applying a little logic he realised it was condensation from the air conditioning and thought no more of it. The seat belt light came on, people returned to their seats and we duly belted-up. The angle of descent changed such that the trickle of condensation marched forward to the front of our cabin and started to drip. Beneath the drip sat what can only described as a city gent. He was impeccably dressed in a dark pin-striped suit and had a smart leather briefcase on his lap. The few drips had become a steady flow. The cabin attendants were busy. The city gent was unflappable. With a flourish he opened his case and voila he raised his telescopic umbrella, and sheltered thus until we landed.

Gorse Fox always feel sorry for nervous travellers. He settled down in his seat for a morning flight to Newcastle. Breaking the ice he started to chat to the chap next to me. The plane taxied away from the gate and took off heading out over Windsor then turning right to head north. There were gusty winds making it a bit of a roller coaster. Breakfast was served and the chat continued. Gorse Fox put his coffee cup back on the tray as his neighbour raised his to his lips, and the pilot found an air pocket. The plane plummeted. My neighbour's coffee plummeted also, but not as fast as the plane. For an instant the coffee seemed to hang above the cup ( Gorse Fox supposes it was instant coffee) before refilling the receptacle and splashing all over the neighbour. His face went white, he very slowly and deliberately place the cup back on the tray, grasped the armrests until his knuckles went white and never said another word.

Some incidents fail to instil confidence in the nervous traveller. On another winter flight up to Newcastle Gorse Fox had the luxury of an aisle seat right at the front of the plane. The pre-flight checks seem to have been quite long and we missed our take-off slot. Once airborne the flight was quite bumpy as we through fierce cross-winds. As we approach Newcastle and commenced our approach the door of the cockpit swung open and Gorse Fox was able to watch the last few miles through a pilot's eye view. However this was punctuated by several different alarms going off on the flight-deck and much frantic activity by pilot and co-pilot. As the plane touched down it was escorted by a fleet of fire-tenders all the way to the gate and as we disembarked engineers swarmed over the plane while fire-fighters still stood ready with their foam cannons tracking up and down the plane. No explanation was offered and we all dispersed. Later that afternoon the Gorse Fox returned to the airport for the return journey. He arrived early, as usual and sat and watched the air traffic. Suddenly, a fleet of fire tenders sped onto the runway with all their emergency lights flashing. Again they escorted a plane to the gate, carefully keeping an eye on it until the passengers had disembarked and the engineers were back on the job. GF noticed this was the same plane he had travelled up in that morning. Worse still, it was the plane he was about to board for the flight home. On the flight back, he could again hear alarms and sirens going off on the flight deck, but we landed without incident, and GF never found out what had been going on. GF thanks God, however, that he's not a nervous flier!