Physioterrorism

In the past it has been necessary for the Silver Vixen to subject herself to various courses of physio-terrorism. As the Gorse Fox waded through some old files he found the following notes that he had made at the time:

The Silver Vixen attended physiotherapy a couple of times each week. Leslie was a great physio, always providing a wealth of guidance and support and a seemingly limitless variation of exercises, obviously developed and perfected over the hundreds of years following the Spanish Inquisition!

Leslie also had an endless supply of anecdotes which used to brighten the sessions.
When the hospital was being extended the physiotherapy department was relocated to a temporary portable cabin in the grounds. Within the cabin were some cubicles for massage and what Leslie refers to a TLC. One very large woman, several years past her prime insisted that instead of stripping to her underwear for her massage, she must strip naked. She did this and stood waiting in the cubicle. Noticing a blind in the corner, she raised it to see what was outside. The blind covered a full length window, the other side of which was a you builder eating his lunch. As the blind went up he looked up, dropped his sandwich and ran for it. Our lady roared with laughter and explained to Leslie what had happened. "I'll bet that made his day" she finished off. Leslie confided in us it was more likely to have ruined it, or turned the poor boy gay!

She also told us about the Zimmer frame:

The ubiquitous zimmer frame came up in conversation. This triggered another of Leslie's tales. A slightly vague, elderly lady was pushed in on a wheelchair that she didn't strictly need. During the session it was explained to her that she could get a zimmer frame which would support her when she walked. Rather vaguely she insisted that she would get hold of the frame herself. Her family reported that she went home and looked through the local phone directory for a Dr Zimmer, and coincidentally managed to find one in our area. Phoning the unsuspecting doctor she demanded in, stentorian tones, details about the frame and where she could pick it up. The doctor thought this was a wind up and claimed ignorance of the whole situation. The lady phoned back several times, but the doctor hung up. At the next physio session the lady was asked if she wanted a zimmer frame. "Not likely" she replied. "Phoned the chap, not at all helpful. Won't bother".