Tuesday, September 12, 2017

Gone phishing

Tuesdays started much the same way as it usual does. Jasper yanked the Gorse Fox out of bed and demanded his breakfast. The Gorse Fox obliged and settled down to his first coffee of the day and eventually some breakfast of his own.

Next there was football. Not a great success today with only one win out of 6 games. What did make it interesting, however, was the fact that the ref ditched the "walking" rule for the very last game and allowed unconstrained running. The Gorse Fox loved this. It made the whole thing so much more natural. (His team still lost, but that's the way it goes).

When he got home and showered he checked his phone. There was a message (shown here).

At first you worry. Then your brain kicks into gear. HSBC do not identify themselves as H.S.B.C. Perhaps more importantly, the Gorse Fox doesn't have any HSBC accounts. The worry stopped.

The Gorse Fox decided he should do his civic duty.

He called HSBC and eventually got through to an account representative who show no interest whatsoever. He just told the Gorse Fox not to worry and to delete the message. With service like that, the Gorse Fox is glad he isn't an HSBC customer.

Next stop was the Action Fraud line. The Gorse Fox phoned and waited in a queue. He continued to wait in a queue. A glacier melted. He waited some more. Continents drifted apart. He waited. Finally someone finished their lunch and answered the phone. He explained the nature of his attack and the young lady said she would prepare a report and could the Gorse Fox wait on the line. In a distant galaxy a star collapsed and formed a black hole. The phone crackled back into life. She had prepared the report and would submit it. Finally she asked if it would be ok for media companies to contact the Gorse Fox - he said no. Did he need counselling because of the experience? - he said no. Did he need emotional support? - no (but he would like the last hour of his life back). She then read out his reference number and a password to allow him to track the report. That was it. Bizarre!

Doing your civic duty can be a strange experience and occupy a significant portion of your day.

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